You couldn’t make it up, Jessie J says. There she was gearing up for her first album release in eight years, ecstatically in love with her recent boyfriend, and at long last the parent to a young child after struggling to conceive for ten years, on top of the world. Then in spring she was diagnosed with breast cancer.
The singer-songwriter, actual name Jess Cornish, is famous for speaking her mind. The record, Don’t Tease Me With a Good Time, was supposed to be an transparent story, addressing every moment of pain she’d faced since she last worked on songs (endometriosis, miscarriage, failed relationships, psychological manipulation, suicidal thoughts) with her usual frankness. The initial release, her single No Secrets, was dropped in the spring. But by then there remained a major undisclosed truth. The illness. Later second single, the upbeat Living My Best Life, debuted in late spring and the artist was giving interviews about how she was thriving, while at the same time living with the disease. Subsequently she went public, and in early July she had a mastectomy.
She shoots me her best “Are you kidding?” expression. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every media appearance, and they inquire, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I answer, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” Cornish has just had to postpone shows because she’s yet to undergo reconstructive surgery.
We meet at a studio in the capital. She is sporting a beige fake-leather jacket, blue jeans with detailed white appliqués, off-white boots and big frames. Imagine rocker vibe meets 70s singer aesthetic. “It seems like I’m in the seventies and I should have a boyfriend with a big tache.” Easy Rider, I say, referencing the movie. “That’s what people called me at school!” She beams. Jessie is sharp-witted, irreverent and direct. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is hoping to make her standup debut in the coming year. “I like entertaining. On stage I often tease the fans.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
Cornish was preparing for an performance at the awards show when she discovered a mass. “I immediately went to get it looked at, had an test, and they said, ‘It appears fine; your breasts are normal.’ And I responded, ‘Yet I sense it. My arm hurts and tingling in my hands whenever I rise.’ And they suggested, ‘Well, let’s just do a biopsy?’ It happened on March 28, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The doctor told her if it was concerning she’d contact on the start of the week. By then Cornish had persuaded herself it was fine. The way she explains it, it was simply too inconvenient to face illness when she had so much on.
“It was a fortnight prior from releasing the album after years away and no new music. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Is six okay?’ And I thought, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I log in thinking it’s all going to be fine, and she goes, ‘You might want to sit.’ The solemn tone? And she reveals, ‘Unfortunately but your test results have indicated high-grade cancer cells.’” What did you say? “I replied, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ My initial thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She viewed the procedure terrifying and absurd. “I fear going under. They lead you. During crises you roll down in a bed, but then I just strolled down with a medical attire and my rear exposed. Like a dystopian scene.” But, she notes, she’s been fortunate. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the procedure. “It’s terrible, but you know what? I’m grateful it was caught soon. I had the mastectomy recently and my right breast now appears as a odd shape.” She smiles again. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The follow-up procedure is therapeutic and aesthetic. Her chest, she remarks, are now “different sizes. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. That’s impolite! I felt, why make it worse, I’m already having a hard period. So rude! Ironically I said I’d never get my boobs done because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be ideal. Illness changed that.”
Previous Struggles
Cornish is no stranger to illness. She thinks her perspective on the cancer has been so upbeat because she’s familiar with medical emergencies. They have often coincided with peak moments, acting as a reminder, or blow, to remind her not to assume everything is fine. “Truly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘You having a good time? Take a seat.’ Since childhood, it has always gone alongside moments of success for me; something severe or obscure has impacted my body.”
She recalls to her 11-year-old self, already making her debut performing in the stage in Whistle Down the Wind (she was selected at the age of nine). That’s when she was found to have the cardiac issue a syndrome, which can cause a tachycardia as well as vertigo and heart flutters. “I was going in and out of rehearsals on an intravenous line, and being readmitted at night.” She jumps ahead half a dozen years, and young Jessica has become part of the female band the group while enrolled in the Brit School. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a brain incident. Then when I was about to put out music in recently I had a car crash and my larynx moved up and I was unable to vocalize for a year.”
Wow, I say, hold on, I can’t keep up. At just 17? She nods|agrees
